Shadow
by jayhogartismyangel
Summary: Clare's feelings of living in her sister's shadow and finally breaking free. A short little songfic to the song, Shadow by: Ashlee Simpson.


**Shadow**

**Summary: A oneshot songfic set to the song, Shadow by: Ashlee Simpson. Clare's feelings of living in her sister's shadow and finally breaking free. **

**A/N: This has been on my mind for some time now and I've finally gotten around to writing it out. Basically inspired by the season eight episodes----especially Uptown Girl and Jane Says. In Jane Says, Clare looked so happy and confident when Reese flirted with her at The Dot and then when KC complimented her and she told KC in Uptown Girl that her sister was, "The pretty and popular one." and that she was good at being, "The Smart One." She'd obviously never considered herself attractive until well into season eight. **

_I was six years old_

_When my parents went away_

_I was stuck inside a broken life_

_I couldn't wish away_

_She was beautiful_

_She had everything and more_

_And my escape was hiding out and running for the door_

_Somebody listen please_

_It used to be so hard being me_

Clare and Darcy Edwards. Different as night and day. Clare was the smart one. The responsible one. Darcy however, awed everyone who came into contact with her. And all her life, Clare had been compared to her older, pretty and popular sister. Coming into Degrassi, she knew what everyone expected of her. She couldn't be that though. She was good at one thing and one thing only and that was school. She didn't know how to smile at the boys and make them want her. She wasn't popular nor was she as pretty as her sister. And she most certainly wasn't a cheerleader.

When she started her freshman year at Degrassi, she didn't have many expectations. Go to school, get good grades, make her parents proud. After everything that had happened to her sister just the year before, her parents had become even stricter. Of course, it made sense why they were scared. After all, her sister _had _been raped and that rapist had never been caught. Her mother and father hadn't even wanted to enroll her in Degrassi until Darcy had told them it would be a good thing. It seemed that everything revolved around Darcy. Alot of the time, Clare felt left out. It was as if she didn't even have a voice in her own home.

_Living in the shadow_

_Of someone else's dream_

_Trying to find a hand to hold but every touch felt cold to me_

_Living in a nightmare_

_A never-ending sleep_

_But now that I am wide awake_

_My chains are finally free_

_Don't feel sorry for me_

She didn't want people to feel sorry for her because of all this. There were people in worse situations than her's. Children starving in Africa, kids suffering from abuse and neglect. She atleast had a roof over her head and food in her stomach and people that she could depend on. Some people didn't have any of that.

_All the days collided _

_One less perfect than the next_

_I was stuck inside someone else's life and always second best_

_Oh, I love you now 'cause now I realize_

_That it's safe outside to come alive in my identity_

_So if you're listening_

_There is so much more to me you haven't seen_

Coming to Degrassi had been a blessing in disguise. It had been where she'd truly found herself. She'd been placed in the gifted class, had joined the "Robot Wars" team, she'd gained really good friends, she'd found herself a boyfriend, she'd finally gotten rid of her private school uniform, and had found a passion for photography. Things were finally working out for her. She had finally broken herself free from her older sister's shadow.

_Mother, sister, father, sister, mother_

_Everything's cool now_

_Mother, sister, father, sister, mother_

_Everything's cool now_

_Oh, my life is good_

_I've got more than anyone should_

_Oh, my life is good_

_And the past is in the past_

She'd finally come to terms with everything and it was all okay now. She had more than any one person should. Good friends, a great boyfriend, being one of the smartest girls in school, parents who finally weren't comparing her to her older sister and who weren't as overprotective. A loving sister who was doing alot of good in Kenya. The world was alot happier for Clare Edwards. She was finally living life for herself and not for anyone else. She was doing the things that she enjoyed, the things that made _her _happy.

_I was living in the shadow_

_Of someone else's dream _

_Trying to find a hand to hold but every touch felt cold to me_

_I'm living in a new day_

_I'm living it for me _

_And now that I am wide awake_

_Then I can finally be_

_Don't feel sorry for me_

_Don't feel sorry, don't feel sorry for me_

_Living in, living in, living in a shadow_

_Living in, living in, a new day_

Smiling, Clare looked torwards the picture of she and her sister that sat on her nightstand. She really should switch it when Darcy got back from Kenya. That picture was something that represented the _old _her. The her that was just a dim glow compared to her sparkling and colorful sister. It was a new day.

_**The End**_


End file.
